School's out for me no doubt
It's the end of my Galician camino for now, bring me the hot Madrid summer...
When I was deciding to move Galicia, I had my ‘big eyes of wonder’ on. I love picturing the future. I saw all the hiking opportunities (when I’m not being rained on) in nature. I saw a humid wooded climate more similar to home. The trees truly are worth all the hype. In the dream it’s easy to forget the intimidation that comes with traveling a path you haven’t before. I saw all the friends I planned to make using Bumble (an app) like I had before in Madrid but it’s not as popular here. I’ve even reached out to quite a few people on Facebook like the grandma that I am. I put myself out there. I envisioned apartment shopping, it’s exciting moving to a new place. Lots of people regularly surf the web weighing the pros and cons of homes you may or may not actually be considering to live. I like to picture the parallel universes where I made different choices. Starting a new job never turns out how you picture it, I’ve done that enough times to know. Learning each new person that oversees me takes time, and by the time I’ve mastered it there’s just a month left to the school year. The teachers are much nicer this year, I try to appreciate every instance of friendliness. I can’t say my experience in Galicia matched what I had thought but I’m still grateful for my time here.
There are downsides always, though I try to remain optimistic. Here there’s only the standard couple of teachers that I can’t stand, this is usually the case, but luckily I only see them a couple hours each a week. One in each of the schools I work at. They are careless, thoughtless, oblivious to their impact on children and I don’t why they partake in teaching at all. However rude I have nicknamed one of my least favorites ‘the witch,’ she whistles loud enough to break your eardrum and her English is pretty bad. She loves to put people on the spot, say ‘the kids have no respect,’ (very standard bad teacher motto) and not listen to anyone but expect them to do so. The other “teacher” sits in the back of the room with a laptop, but occasionally gets up to mess up my lesson by telling kids to shut up when they’re learning or interrupting to talk about completely random things. I do wish I could appreciate that ‘assistance.’ He is the mayor of the town (his nickname) that should stick to just one profession.
Unlike last year, I work with my boss directly, both of them. It’s better than it sounds, rather than a looming everything-through-the-grapevine communication style that I suffered before. My high school boss is young, fairly easily distracted and has too many ideas at once. She has a particularly strong British accent and also teaches French. She has commented on my enthusiasm but she appreciates my material. Still she is so much better than last boss, light years more understanding. I genuinely like her as a person and we have great conversations. Every teacher sure does have a temper though that often presents itself during class. My elementary boss is very chill, she is the one teacher that graciously accepts my help– and needs it. It is truly a gift, to not have to fight my way in to correct her but rather simply being asked whenever necessary, truly making a learning opportunity whenever the situation presents itself. She has great games and her 7 years of experience really show. She always says she has poor organization but she’s not the mess she describes. She is a bit awkward but has been very helpful to me and I’m very grateful to work for such kind teachers that are so good at their jobs.
I do find myself missing my companions, other assistants just like me, someone to relate to, other foreign people. I’ve lately been making attempts to explore the pueblos (small towns) that I work in. The high school is in Ponteceso, a hilly and wet town with lots of plant shops, fishermen, streams, and of course bars and cafes. People stare at me pretty hard here in such a small town but there’s lots of dogs. Baio is even a bit less of a town with a backroad vibe. Every town I’ve been to around here has water running through it. It is quite flat in contrast to the other. Carballo, where I live, hasn’t grown on me as much as I would’ve hoped. I walk around almost every day, I know every dog on sight (and some of their owners through observation.) One of the only shops I’ve been drawn to is a macrame jewelry store which I was surprised to discover is owned by a young woman that speaks English while buying a present for my sister. The bars are quite average to me and I’m not sure I really made any friends that are likely to pass the test of time and distance. However, I was fortunate enough to meet some other auxiliares ‘language assistants’ from the Philippines. I also made a Scottish friend that lives in A Coruña which has been a great experience. Each day I walk along the river in my town, it's about 3 kilometers each way (like a 5k in all both ways, 3 miles.) They just moved one of the grocery stores I frequented and put in a McDonalds. It’s a simple but very safe place to live for me and I have generally fond memories.
I’m looking forward to the summer. June is quite busy for me. I’ll be moving back to Madrid which I look forward to. I do fear the heat as this May has been even a bit chilly for me, windy. I’ve been living alone because my girlfriend moved back to Madrid for a job. (We’re excited, she works at the hospital she worked at before as a lab tech but now works with clinical trials.) I look forward to settling down a bit, as I have moved so often steadily in the last few years. A teacher’s summer is always a bit intimidating for me. The “American workaholic” in me thinks hard about job opportunities for those 4 months. The Spanish side convinces me that it's just that, a vacation that should be enjoyed until work resumes. Other teachers have discussed going to Greece and things like that with their time and I envy their mindsets on the matter. I do aim for the Spanish to truly teach me how to relax. I plan to cook a lot, go swimming, wear lots of sunscreen, write, exercise and establish a nice routine. Turning 25 seems to have really prompted me to value a good routine. It’s always been the goal but life has always felt so fast and I bore easily so it’s been a battle.
I’m very focused on being healthy and well-rounded which has always been important to me but I now have the gift of time. I only worked part-time hours and Spanish work ends at 3pm so I have more free time than I ever would in the U.S. It’s intimidating to use it ‘correctly,’ all those things you can do now that you have time, not being able to use the excuse of not having enough. Occasionally this includes rest, a Spanish siesta. A lot more people are sporty here as you might imagine, the glorified mediterranean lifestyle. People play sports to exercise rather than to succeed, scholastically or professionally. There is a lot more value in hobbies. A large portion of the population is retired, you may retire at about 65 and you basically must, which is a welcomed change. I think Europe values artistic pursuits despite the rampant perfectionism. Less people play instruments than I would have thought, there is no marching band sadly or school sports–just gym.
I do miss plenty about home. I miss my family, that sense of belonging without wonder. I do feel guilty being away. I feel the space between us more and more, as this becomes a lifestyle and not a vacation. I miss my dogs and I worry about them. I'm so excited to see them. I miss my friends, I have acquired many great people in my circle and it is rough to maintain them given this grave distance. I miss driving: I think about it more being carpooled around, during the double-the-time bus rides too. The road of being able to drive in Spain is quite long. I’d have to restart as a beginner taking expensive courses for like a year and passing tests. This part of Spain demands having a car and the lack of accessibility does make me sad. I miss the social ease of speaking my native language in all social settings. I have always been socially anxious and that has not ceased. It’s a lot harder for me to be friendly, confident and funny in my second language. I miss seeing people I used to know, a situation that used to make me fairly uncomfortable but now is a virtual impossibility. I miss shitty American food quite a bit, I dream of just going to Sam’s club, picking up some crab rangoons, putting them in the oven and satisfying myself with the whole box, 0 cooking. I miss the foods that make me feel at home, my mom’s cooking, a veggie tray, root beer, apple cider, distinctly Pennsylvanian things.
Life is good. Spain is lovely. In the future, I plan to teach just one more year in Madrid but I’m still awaiting my placement anxiously. I signed up for just primary/elementary school but I do think some of my talents may be wasted working with just one age group. I will likely be pivoting from teaching after that year to something similarly social, helping people, generally aligning with my interests but I have not yet decided. Given Spain’s dynamic I will have to take courses to change professions which can take a few years so I will see what the future has in store for me. I do plan to stay in Madrid though and exhaust all the things there is to do there. I look forward to making lots of friends and thoughtfully building myself a community. I may even go as far as to say I plan to ‘put down some roots’ and I am excited for new experiences.
Spain has been an interesting journey. The ‘good’ is really good, buenisimo. The bad is malisimo too. I understand a lot of things I couldn’t quite get before like what it’s really like to move countries as so many people have done to go to the U.S. It does make one feel generally misunderstood. It’s also odd being in an education system on the other side, I try hard to be a good teacher. In general it is exhausting. But I will try to sit back and be proud of myself, it's not something I do too often. I’m excited to have the privilege of being able to go home for a couple weeks, it is a stroke of luck. But then comes the paradox of not feeling exactly at home anywhere. That 's okay. I probably overthink these kinds of things. I’m working on it.